Celebration V – SURVIVE
Spending Warm Summer Days Indoors…
So here’s the breakdown — I live in “Hotlanta” now, but I was born and braised in Florida. My partner and I lived in Orlando (tip — don’t call it “O-Town”) and I’m going to cut through all of the shiny, sunny public relations spiel to give you advice that you’ll need to survive and enjoy Star Wars Celebration V.
Having been to events at the Convention Center, it is problematic (at best) to keep the venue cooled at the peak of summer heat. Being anywhere in Florida, in August, it’s swelteringly hot. It is really up to you to stay cool. If someone doesn’t gauge the HVAC to combat the blistering heat outside, then add in a throng of "unconventional conventionists" (to borrow a phrase) and things can become rather uncomfortable.
#1. Hydration — You know all those studies that have said that caffeinated drinks lead to dehydration? They were paid for by companies that want to sell you bottled water. Even a caffeinated drink can give your body vital fluids. That Coke Zero Cherry (my choice) will give you ample hydration, but, as with every other drink, you'll need to keep a constant supply flowing through your body. A soda loaded with HFCS, though, will put a strain on your body as it processes that mess, and it's not going to do you much good at all.
Top picks to keep your body happily hydrated include Power Ade Zero — avoid the red and blue ones — which has no calories and all the basics that one looks for in a "sports drink", Vitamin Water Zero (which has kept me out of the hospital at least once) and, naturally, WATER. (Gatorade, which was invented at the University of Florida, and its "lower calorie" G2 varieties are are still sweetened with sugar and HFCS. Read your labels!)
I assume that we're all adults here, and if you indulge too much, drink TWICE the "hydrating beverage" and keep it flowing. In the summer heat, a hangover can lead to the hospital very quickly. I'm never one to turn down a cocktail, but my "after-party" is always followed by a heavy flush of liquids that aren't going to make my innards turn against me.
#2. Fans — Those little battery-powered fans (even old-fashioned hand-fans) are great, but they aren't air-conditioners. Some even have little "water misting" devices for that extra bit of cool – and it keeps your "face" on if you're wearing make-up. I still recommend grabbing one (and they're available most anywhere) just for that little waft of breeze that offers that little extra bit of comfort. I don't care if I look like an old church lady, I bust out the little fan, and if I could, I'd have a Jawa with a giant palm-frond fanning me, Jabba The Hutt-style. (Well, not a Jawa, but Jake Gyllenhaal won't even wave his restraining order at me.)
#3. Hygiene — Use a deodorant with antiperspirant. We all want to smell clean and fresh, but a river of sweat is your body forcing water out to cool you down, depriving your inner organs. (See #1.) Unless your dermatologist has diagnosed you with hyper-hydrosis, profuse sweating is a sign that you need to slow your pace and gulp down about two pints of water STAT.
I also recommend Comme des Garçons Incense Avignon Series 3 and No. 88 by Czech and Speake, but I'm a scent snob. (Guys! Ditch that Axe stuff. It's made for teenage boys, not grown men.)
Bonus Tip! Dusting your pits and parts (that sweat) with Gold Bond or even regular baby powder can reduce profuse sweating (and stains). Just be careful not to get white streaks all over your clothes.
#4. Relax — It is practically impossible to see and do everything you want to do at a Star Wars Celebration. When you find that little extra bit of free time, take a break! Sit, hydrate, fan, chill, etc. Your body is a machine, and if you don't pace yourself you'll be in for a world of hurt when you go back to your hotel. Unless you regularly run marathons, you may be able to rush around and do a lot, but you'll suffer the consequences sooner or later.
#5. Health — In any massive hive of scum and villainy, the chance that you'll catch some random bug increases substantially. Take your vitamins. A chewable multi-vitamin will be absorbed by your body better than a lumpy pill that your digestive system won't completely process. Two childrens chewable vitamins will actually give you more vitamins than an adult a-to-zinc pill. (For my fellow vegetarians and vegans, sorry, but the chewables on regular store shelves are likely to have gelatin, so check your veg-friendly or health food store for options.)
If you think you're falling ill… I'm sure you'll know what to do. (That is where my advice ends, and your need to see a doctor begins.)
Please print this friendly bit of opinionated advice out, and when you see your friendly Galactic Blogger nursing a hangover, you can use the print out to fan me whilst calling me a hypocrite. (I did say I used to live in Orlando, but I'm not telling you where the party's at.)*
*I am as pure as driven sludge, but I can promise you that I won't stink. I'll also be doing everything I can to stay cool. (No-hipster.)
